Gripes, Puking Fish

Emotional. Roller. Coaster.

I think I might have overbooked myself recently. As soon as I received a kink in the chain, it began to unravel like a sweater... It still remains one of those cute little capulets - but it is no longer a sweater. I am missing my other half quite frequently between night school, full time work, lots of overtime to be done, study time and time for himself. I am beginning to feel as though I am alone but not really. This is a very unsettling feeling.

Compassion grows within me for moms with many children and no husband around for whatever reason. I told a good friend of mine this recently and she replied, "yes, except you do not recieve any kind of assistance and you are with your children 24-7 instead of having (or being able to at some moments) work." Ah yes this is true. But y'all help me out of this pity party please.

I want a moment to get my toes all pretty, go eat lunch or dinner with a friend, go for a run in a decent neighborhood (not mine that's for sure), date my husband, leave the house for a quick errand. I know this will all be over soon and life will carry on and I should look at the ups instead of the downs. Optimism is usually where I lean (at least I think I do). Lately it is blanketed by a dark gray mass and I am not sure when it will lift. Happiness and rainbows are tucked away somewhere for a bit...maybe in my armpits?

I am glad I am not sick like I thought I was. I believe I developed an allergy to - of all things - cod (or maybe pollock). Therefore, I puke when I eat it. Lovely reaction but I suppose it could be much worse! I need to make an appointment to see an allergist as I would like to know definitely if I have the allergy to latex as well - oh yeah and milk and bananas and dust and kiwi and and and ....